I know the theme of this month’s newsletter is Trust & Faith, but I think all the pumpkin spice is getting to my brain because all I can think about is Fall. I love how the weather has changed. There is a crispness in the air, and the gloomy overcast days of summer are gone. I love it! The sun is shining in the morning and it has been amazing. But looking back, I was just as excited about summer coming. I am definitely going to miss the days of no school and beach trips and long nights. Just because one season is coming to an end and another is beginning doesn’t mean we can’t celebrate that past season while embracing the new one.
As we trust (like that… there is is: TRUST. See, I’m not a total delinquent) that the seasons are going to change throughout the year, we also have to trust that the seasons in our life are also going to evolve. I have been looking back on the days when my kids were little and romanticizing them. Now that my kids are all in elementary school (they are almost 6, 7, and 8) I’ve entered the “uber” season of motherhood … and I do not intend it’s German origins. I feel like all I do is micromanage my kids’ schedules and drive them from place to place. School, dance, soccer, gymnastics, church …lather, rinse, repeat. We have not a single day of the week when we can just be home and do nothing. Someone has something. Always. It’s exhausting. The mental capacity it takes to keep it all straight and get everyone everywhere on time is no joke. Oh and did I mention, I’m also trying to balance being a business owner, wife, and my own person all at the same time. My “own person”… hilarious. (Sidebar: We are women, we are amazing!! I am giving all of you a running, jumping, high five. You deserve it. You are rad.)
Back to Trust. The other day, I was reminiscing about the days when our kids were little and how wonderful and amazing it was to not have to take them to school, and soccer, and dance etc. We had maybe one daytime activity a week and that was it. Remember how glorious those days were?!? We could just go for walks, snuggle, read stories, and cook all day long. (That’s what I remember, really). And then, thankfully, one of my closest friends came over with her one and two year old, and I actually remembered how HARD it was to stay home with little ones. Someone is either crying, yelling, or a combination of the two. Don’t get me wrong, her children are adorable and happy and perfect. They are just ages one and two. And then I remembered how I used to feel like I was a prisoner in my own house who was chained to nap and feeding and bed times and even if I did take my kids out, it was so much more difficult than just staying home so eventually I stopped even trying. So I spent the days trying to make babies happy and constantly undoing the messes they were making. I was exhausted. Mentally and physically.
So, while that part hasn’t changed, I’m learning to trust in the seasons of life and appreciate each one for what it is. I need to remember that I will never get this time back again. In a few years they will be driving themselves places and I won’t get to spend all that time in the car with them, laughing, singing songs, and learning about their day. That time in the car is special. Watching them learn to master a new sport or dance move or headstand is special. These seasons of life come and go with a fury that I can’t control, but I am darn well going to appreciate them for what they are and not look back. So adios Summer, hello Fall! Pumpkin chai lattes all around!